Cherishing.

I’m struggling with this lately.

Just a few weeks ago, I was doing just fine, cherishing everything. But then life resumed, and finals were more important than falling in love; working took priority over whimsicality; drama reigned over dancing and doodling.

I don’t know what happened. Sometimes things fall out of line. Like me, almost every day. But I usually recover. I’m feeling held down, overwhelmed, and scheduled. I need structure, but I hate being scheduled. I need Sunday afternoon naps. That can’t happen anymore. I need my musical evenings of dancing and playing and singing. That doesn’t occur lately. I need to get lost in a good book. Well, if that book is called Algebra 1, then I’m in luck.

 

I’m gonna need to start forcing myself to dance everyday. Forcing myself to create scrumptious cookies like I used to. I need to mandate an hour of doodling in the mornings. Or an evening of girly things, like baths, pedicures, and chick flicks.

Though, it probably isn’t going to happen. I cannot wait to escape this town, and just take it easy in the sun for six weeks. All I’ll have to worry about is reading adventure and Jane Austen by the pool, and there’ll be no drama, no hold-backs, no inhibitions. Just cherishing.

 

I love being busy, I have to be busy. But there’s a line that I’ve seemed to cross. And I can’t erase it right now, but never again will I draw it.